There is an important tip for online dating that is rarely mentioned in online dating sites.

Meeting someone right for dating online is becoming easier. Many sites offer specialty matching opportunities.  Completing a profile and posting a photo is routine for many. Finding matches to the general qualities one is looking for is also part of what I’m referring to as “easy”.

The process becomes more complicated when each party feels ready to meet.

The issues that need to be checked off by now are:

  1. How much do you trust what you read about the other person? Some times looking at more than one photo helps to get a sense of the other person. Does that person post and share photos of him/herself with friends and family.  Are the people in the photos people with whom you would want to socialize? Can you relate to the activities you see in the photos.  How comfortable and connected is the person your going to meet with others in these photos?
  2. Are there safety issues that you have resolved?  Always great if you can find that there is a mutual friend or acquaintance that can vouch for or legitimize the person’s history. Is there workplace information that verifies who the person is.  Have you googled each other. Consider a background check.
  3. After finding each other on line, the next step can be chatting by email, talking by phone.  Does all this still feel good without any red flags?  Red flags should stop the process and time to move on to another “candidate”.
  4. Now is the time to meet in person.  Here is where my important tip comes in.

By now, there is probably sharing information about your important fun things to do.  My advice is Do Not make one of these the venue for your first meeting.  Wondering why I recommend this?

Meeting a prospective date is an important part of this entire process.  People can look great on paper, or talk up an exciting phone conversation, look great in photos, but the chemistry of meeting in person is most telling.  Same reason most jobs require at least one in person interview.

So, why my tip about not meeting in a venue that you usually enjoy?  Because, if you don’t enjoy the connection with this person, you will continue to run into them afterwards, and this can  be  awkward. Why ruin your comfort in enjoying your favorite coffee shop?

50PlusConnects.com offer ways to connect for dating, to find a travel companion, a house sharing mate or just a friend.  Take the process seriously, but also make it a fun time…even if you don’t find the man or woman of your dreams, you may find a fun friend.

erodino

About erodino


Elaine Rodino, PhD., is CEO of Senior Premier Dating LLC, is a licensed psychologist in private practice. She is a fellow of the American Psychological Association (APA), Pennsylvania Psychological Association and the Los Angeles Society of Clinical Psychologists. Dr. Rodino is a past president of the APA Divisions of Independent Practice, The Society for Media Psychology and Technology, Central Pennsylvania Psychological Association, Los Angeles County Psychological Association (LACPA), the Foundation of LACPA, and recipient of the Distinguished Lifetime Contribution to Media Psychology Award, and the Distinguished Service Award to LACPA. She has appeared on T.V. and radio and contributes to magazines, newspapers and online health sites on issues regarding Couples, Relationships, Sandwich Generation, Holiday Blues, and other popular topics.


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