Many boomer and senior age people are finding themselves back in the dating world…and times have changed.  When you started dating no one even knew the definition of “internet” or “online”.   Most people met people to date through friends, single meet ups or at bars.  The bar scene and single meet up parties were referred to as  “meat markets” and everyone hated them.  Meeting someone through a friend could be embarrassing if you really didn’t connect well.

Along came the internet and the online way of meeting others.  At first, it may seem like a very daunting process.  People have uncomfortable feelings about the vulnerability and the need to be more proactive.

The truth is, it is the best thing ever!  Where else and when else in all the centuries of courting has there been such a thorough way to review and interview a potential date.  The process of review and interviewing is actually quite an opportunity to “investigate” the kind of qualities, aspects, experiences and lifestyles of each other.

For a start, there is a need for you to be as honest as you can in portraying who you are and who and what you are looking for.  Why use photos that are 10 years old, or that were taken during those 15 minutes when you were skinny?  Doing this kind of misrepresentation speaks to your insecurity about who you are.  If you misrepresent  who you are and how you look, how secure will you feel when you need to meet someone in person?  I imagine you would feel dreadful, and possibly never want to really meet up with someone in person, so then…what’s the point of this whole effort?

Therefore, if you’re inclined to feel shy or worried about how to present yourself in your profile it may help to get professional assistance from a dating coach.  Dating coaches specialize in helping to walk people through the process of dating.  They are not mental health counselors, psychologists or psychotherapists.  They are specifically educated and trained in how to “coach” people through such processes.  They can help you to be able to present yourself in a positive and truthful manner so you feel good about your profile and will feel good about the prospect of meeting someone in person for the first time.  Go ahead and click on the Coaches Roster at 50PlusConnects.com.  Find a dating coach that suits you and click to make contact.  Date coaching is free for three and six-month subscribers….quite a fantastic deal!

Find love text on keyboard buttonPart of posting a successful profile is describing who you are wanting to meet.  Are you looking for a romantic relationship, a platonic relationship, a travel buddy,  a house sharing mate, or perhaps all of these?   Be honest in describing the kind of person you are looking for.  Some people are open to many kinds of other people – that’s fine.  If you’re looking specifically for a tall person, or a short person or someone who loves the outdoors and camping – say it!

Finally, you’re set to search the website to find the person you’re looking for.  Don’t just sit back and wait to see who finds you.  Women often do all the work of completing a profile and posting photos and then just wait and wait. The beauty of online dating is that you too can go searching to find your connection.  When you find one or two or more persons who sound interesting to you – go ahead and send them a message.  These message exchanges take place right on the website, so you are not yet disclosing your own personal email or phone number.

At this point, you’re on the way to connecting with other single 50 plus boomers and/or seniors. Listen to our date coaching webinars and read more of our articles for tips on connecting and relationships. Enjoy this process.

erodino

About erodino


Elaine Rodino, PhD., is CEO of Senior Premier Dating LLC, is a licensed psychologist in private practice. She is a fellow of the American Psychological Association (APA), Pennsylvania Psychological Association and the Los Angeles Society of Clinical Psychologists. Dr. Rodino is a past president of the APA Divisions of Independent Practice, The Society for Media Psychology and Technology, Central Pennsylvania Psychological Association, Los Angeles County Psychological Association (LACPA), the Foundation of LACPA, and recipient of the Distinguished Lifetime Contribution to Media Psychology Award, and the Distinguished Service Award to LACPA. She has appeared on T.V. and radio and contributes to magazines, newspapers and online health sites on issues regarding Couples, Relationships, Sandwich Generation, Holiday Blues, and other popular topics.


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